REASONS FOR GETTING BANGED UP IN AN INSANE ASYLUM

Back in the 19th century it wouldn’t take much to get you banged up in a mental asylum. Some of the reasons are great: laziness, egotism, disappointed love, female disease, mental excitement, imaginary female trouble, gathering in the head, jealousy, religion, asthma, masturbation, and even ‘deranged’ masturbation

Shame on you if you can’t find a category here you wouldn’t fit into.

But think on this for a minute; what would they make of the current crop of nutcases walking our streets? I’m sure I could come up with a list of those who would be banged up in an insane asylum in the 19th century.

• Saying you’re transgender just to get me me me attention

• Claiming to be genderfluid 

• Expressing Woke ideology in public

• A lack of humour

• Bursting into tears because you’ve been misgendered

• Accusing someone of being a racist because you don’t agree with their point of view

• Accusing someone of being far-right for no other reason than to turn neighbour against neighbour

• Wanting to cut your dick off

• Insisting people use imaginary pronouns to identify you

• Understanding what pronouns are

• Exhaustion or delicacy of intellect

• Believing that all white people are far-right thugs because they object to government inaction on knife crime

• Gluing yourself to a motorway

• Saying, ‘Oh, I don’t hold with all these conspiracy theories,’ because you’ve no other answer to someone’s argument, an argument that makes total sense to you but goes against something you previously believed

• Hating the person who points out you’ve been lied to instead of hating the person who’s been lying to you    

• Believing that Adam had a naked Eve in front of him but he was more interested in an apple

• Believing that a bloke wearing a dress and makeup doesn’t look like a bloke wearing a dress and makeup

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Feel free to add to the list

Copyright © Karl Wiggins